3 to 4: Tell Me About It
The more 3- and 4-year-olds talk, the better they learn to listen.
Talking and chatting are two important ways that preschoolers practice their listening skills. Three-year-olds love to hear themselves talk. They often ask and answer their own questions as they play. By age 4, children enthusiastically engage in conversations with friends and may even become involved in a lengthy “discussion,” about a field trip or favorite playground games.
Double-duty Dialogue
Conversations not only improve your preschooler’s verbal skills, they teach her that she must listen carefully to gain information from others. You may notice that your child enjoys asking you questions to keep your talks going.
Telling stories or reading books out loud to your child is another fun way to enhance her listening skills. Preschoolers often ask to hear the same book over and over. This improves their memory and allows them to practice saying certain words as they help you “reread” the story. Talking about what you read together also helps with vocabulary development.
In learning to be good listeners, preschoolers quickly catch on as to whether or not their parents or friends are earnestly listening to them. They are quite aware if others respond directly to them or pay more attention to distractions like the TV or a phone call. Fours, who can be rather demanding and expect your full attention, will pointedly ask, “Are you really listening to me?”
As preschoolers sharpen their listening skills, they begin to discover that while some words sound the same, they have different meanings. For instance, Dad tells 4-year-old Chris to “duck.” Chris squats down, laughs, and quacks.
You can help your child improve her listening skills by playing games and saying nursery rhymes, but mainly by modeling good listening skills yourself—focus on her as she speaks, make eye contact, reflect on what she’s saying, and resist interrupting.
Susan A. Miller, EdD, is a professor of early childhood education and the author of six books, including Learning Through Play: Sand, Water, Clay, and Wood (Scholastic Inc.). To order call 800-SCHOLASTIC. Dr. Miller is a contributing writer and consultant for Circle Time Activities (Publications International, Ltd., 2001).
